It started a few years ago when the robins built a nest in our pear tree. Dum dums. It’s not that we don’t like robins, it’s just that the birds built their nest too low. Too low for what? Snakes.

We’ve got some big fucking snakes around here. They are fairly harmless, unless you are a baby robin in a pear tree.

We’d been watching the nest. Watching the new robins grow, their tiny beaks popping ever higher out of the nest. While we were out working in the garden, we noticed the robins making a huge racket. I told the boss, “Wow, those robins are really freaking out.” He intuited what was happeing and high-tailed it over to the pear tree where he noticed a snake hanging in a branch with a baby robin in its mouth. The boss grabbed a big stick and beat the snake out of the tree. But it was too late for the robins. Mother nature is a bitch.

We are trying to outsmart the big-ass pine snakes. TBD if this strategy actually works.

The robins aren’t learning any lessons, because they continue to build their nest in the pear tree every year. But now, when a snake comes sniffing for their babies, they know who to turn to — the Boss. The parents will start squawking like crazy and circling Rick. Then he knows to go grab a stick and prepare to beat the crap out of the snakes. He has become their reluctant guardian. He doesn’t kill the snakes, he likes the snakes. But he does stun the crap out of them and then herds them back into the woods. It’s just a bad deal for everyone involved.

This year when we noticed, once again, that the robins built their nest in the pear tree, we decided to be proactive. We can’t be on security duty all day. Hence, the dog cone-of-shame on the pear tree. We hope that might deter the snakes. We’ll see.

The baby robins hatched a few days ago. And snake season hasn’t quite started. Those suckers really start moving into the yard in July. I check the nest daily and watch their tiny beaks peaking ever higher out of the nest and I hope those babies fledge quickly. Fly babies fly!