When the corn starts taseling, the Boss starts drooling. It means the time is near — Sweet Corn Season! When corn season hits, that’s all he will eat for dinner the entirety of the season. His goal is a 300-ear year. Corn is his favorite.

Raccoons also love corn. The little marauders will come in and totally destroy a corn patch just days before the first ears are ready. So rude. They must be able to smell when corn is close to being ripe, so they’ll come in for a taste to see what’s up. And they’ll sample one bite out of each ear. “This ear’s not ready, ok, let’s try this one and this one and this one. Screw it, it’s not sweet enough yet, we’ll come back in a few nights.” (this is the raccoon talking)

Meanwhile they’ve totally trashed the corn patch during their midnight raid. It is a sad morning to come out and find the little bandits have been partying in the corn patch.

So it is Operation Fort Knox around here. The Boss has begun fortifying the structure to protect his precious golden kernels.

He starts by cutting down the hops that have climbed up and across the top of the fence. When the hops disappear, the raccoons better think about doing the same.

Then an entire perimeter inspection is in order to make sure there is nothing touching the wire that stretches across the top of the fence. A stray stem could short out the current before the coons get to it.

You know things are getting serious when he hooks up the “fencer” — the little box that electrifies the perimeter wire. He then tests the system with a long piece of grass to ensure a current is flowing.

He rubs his hands together like an evil villian each time he plugs in the fencer. I know he has fantasies about zapping the crap out of a raccoon. He imagines it scaling the fence, then hitting that electric wire at the top perimeter, getting stunned by the shock, falling to the ground, and skulking away denied its booty.

The only possible weakness in the plan — remembering to plug in the fencer each evening. That could turn into a nightmare. One of us usually wakes in the middle of the night trying to remember if we turned on the fencer.

This is shaping up to be a good corn year. Germination was strong. The first planting is tall and the second planting isn’t far behind. We are feeling the urgency to finish up the five quarts of corn left in the freezer before the new batch arrives. Could this be the 500-ear-year of the Boss’ dreams? Not if the coons beat him to it.